Collection of letters and paintings realized in acrylic and oil on canvas. The collection of letters and paintings expresses a constant search of oneself, using an introspection that result in a personal communication with oneself searching one’s own muse that represents the inspiration to life in “Discover oneself“.

The collection has been painted in Zurich in 2010.

My Dear Muse,

This evening I feel like writing to you few totally uncoordinated thoughts that are crossing my crazy mind. I like to write, it is an exceptional type of communication, it stays, does not fly away, it is not mixed up with sounds, not confused with expressions, gives time to reflect, it is potentially interpreted in millions of different ways based on how the emotions of the writer are intertwined with the feelings of the reader, every single small detail influences the flow of words and creates different meanings.

I find it intriguing to play with words, extremely fascinating to flirt with numbers, irresistible to turn colors into forms and forms into colors, it is a kind of gambling where you can win so many meanings of different kinds.

Soon I will fly back home.

When I fly back home I always enjoy the landing part, the natural pattern of the coast seems to be several goes and returns, sweetly sharp, gently angular, sometimes definite, often jagged, jagged so much that the goes are confused with the returns. My last minute goes or returns always have surprises around their sweet fuzzy corners so I‘ m getting very curious about this challenging and provocative one.

You are my biggest secret.

My biggest secret, there is something priceless and rare in the secrets, secrets can not be shared and cannot share, they have only access to the deep, genuine, spontaneous truths, truths that in the shared things are often confused and a bit polluted by the surroundings and circumstances.

I find it something very extraordinary.

I find it very special to write to you, to catch some thoughts and not let them go, to bring them to life, to live this inspiration with freedom and to not let it go.

So here I am, I decided to start to write to you and to combine my thoughts with my colors.

It is going to be a very interesting journey and hope that you will keep inspiring me, it makes me feel so alive.

A thought is flying to you
Good night My Muse

 

 

My Dear Muse,

My thoughts are several and not coordinate as usual, but they are spontaneous, follow the flow.

I wait a bit before sharing them, they are the shiny shy, deep, dark and bright part of me that often I’m not able to show.

It is strange, you do not exist, but I have this strong sense of intimacy, as an old familiar flavor rediscovered, felt as strange not even for a fraction of a second, totally mine, rich of passionate emotions. A natural instinct, an intense soul.

I smell and breath you, wild sweet scent of never forgotten memories that captures every part of my body and gives me “meanings”.

You can reach an intimate fragile part of me, the existence of it I only know and that never ever was suspected or perceived. This part is a deeply feminine and with you I have experienced for the first time a feeling of vulnerability, a feeling of dependence that courses through the veins, that sweetly conquers and nicely frightens.

In this mixed feeling of unknown intimacy a strong curiosity about you takes me over, your biggest dream, your fears or uncertainties, for what you would like to be remembered and by whom, your favorite poet and poems, who are your heroes and why, your favorite painters, what you love or what you hate, which gift you would like to receive from the nature, which was the most beautiful day of your life, when did you feel to thank your god, for what do you pray, what you regret, a passion for which is worth to die, what give sense to your life, in which moments is difficult for you to say yes or not, what is love for you and which meaning you give to it, where is your border between good and evil, between right and wrong.

But there are some questions that stay without answers, so my dark instinctive side pretends to know without knowing and avoid questions and answers preferring the flow, let it happen, god Destiny will manage. I’m only able to live big passions as you are and I want to live it with all myself, it is just the way I am.

I would love to share all myself with you, my thoughts, feelings, impressions about the places I love, my passions and if I were a door of gold and diamonds, you would be the only one to have the unique and precious key because unique and precious you are for me. There is a sentence of the movie Troy that cross my mind, “Gods envy us because we are mortal, because every moment could be the last for us”.

I enjoy and celebrate every moment with you as it would be the last magic one, marvelous memory that always accompany and will accompany me every single time I need a small little angle of paradise.

Hope you stay and keep inspiring me, it is so strong feeling!

A thought is flying to you
Good night My Muse

 

 

My Dear Muse,

Yesterday an evolution of forms and colors has started to fly direction life.

It starts shy, as a relentless competition between shapes, lines, contours and shadows, an unbridled competition that in the intersections of lines decides what conquers, step after step, the canvass and wins a place in the sun and what contributes to the painting but in the shadow.

This insane competition captures completely my emotions and passions and is turning them into a magical, natural, harmonic, encounter of lines that sculpts a fraction of time to make it eternal.

I love Leonardo, he wrote:
“I, Leonardo, one day will know everything, I’ll be able to dominate all the arts that are open for a man, the ways of the great secrets of the universe and I‘ll be in my artwork as God in the Universe, omnipresent and invisible.

This sentence translates the emotions you feel in front of that infinite and boundless world which is a blank canvas, no limits, no rules, any kind of borders, pure creation, spark of life that becomes infinite.

This painting will be incomprehensible to the world that will see it as a series of meaningless shapes and colors or, for the more sensitive ones, might symbolize an old parchment that represents an emblem of ancient unknown warriors that exudes a sweet taste of primordial battles.

In reality it has a detailed meaning, it is a combination of forms that with passion shapes an A (like my name) and that intertwining each other and intersecting each other forms a door that crosses a key.

All these intersections will be comprehensible only for you.

The colors will be dense almost heavy, bright as the moments that you present me, instinctive, precious, in some stretch a bit pungent, in some spots a bit dark as the mystery that surrounds our life, in a few tracts very deep as my inspiration.

Now our canvas is gently lying on my floor, fair, ambitious, rebel but ready to be tamed.

Let see …

This is unique present for you, a very rare masterpiece.

A thought is flying to you
Good night My Muse

 

 

My Dear Muse,

Today is a pleasure to relax with a warm and strong cup of coffee in bed, outside is so white and cold, I feel like chilling out and painting today. It is going to be one of those “Anto” days, isolated from the world, lost in my paintings, thoughts and writings.
I‘m listening to Morricone music and I’m watching the last part of the movie “Nuovo cinema paradiso”, when Toto is just back to Roma after visiting Sicily and having savored his true essence and his past apparently lost.
He has just won an important premium with his last movie and he is surrounded by people that want to arrange a conference with journalists but he has very sad eyes, and with unhappy eyes he looks at them and then they ask him so what? aren’t you happy?
He leaves without a word for going in the movies room, he has with him a pellicle made of several pieces of pellicles attached containing all kisses he had to cut from the movies when he was young (in Italy it was considered inappropriate at that time to show kisses) and he is sit in the dark of this room.
His white hairs from behind and the numbers on the screen 6 5 4 3 2 1 .. are the prelude to many emotions, all the kissing scenes start one after the other and his expression becomes more and more nostalgic and full of emotions, his eyes turn more and more into shiny and the rest of world is completely obscured by the intensity of these passionate and strong emotions.
I could watch this scene millions of times, I love it so much. It seems that there are passions in life that we keep inside for ever and ever and nothing can dim them.

I wrote something for you few days ago and today I’m doing a collage as Toto did with the kisses.

This evening I‘m enjoying my fire place in the silence of this special part of the world, passionate, impulsive, a bit wild but always brave, brave to face only the deep emotions and escape from the simple and easy ones. In the evening I love the fireplace, I could spend hour and hour looking at the roaring fire. What fascinates me is the glowing color of the wood, consumed by the flames when he is about to crumble and turn into ember, ember when it turns into a streak of orange before it turns to ashes. This magic brings me back, back in time and I see: a wonderful castle, on top of a hill, it shines as crystal in the sun and overlooks the infinite because bright, infinite and endless are the big passions; a castle with solid foundations, as the experiences of life, where no escapes from the reality are allowed and are always tinged with fantasies and dreams; a water stream, crystal clear and turquoise, surrounds the castle, gently hugs it, protects it and reflect dreams and fantasies; a castle with high and heavy doors, a precious emblem visible on both doors, the castle is empty, I’m on the highest peak of the tower and I’m looking away, impatiently looking away;

The rest will come sooner or later

A thought is flying to you
My Muse

 

 

My Dear Muse,

This letter is entitled ”the truth” and you have no idea how much it costs me to write it.
I really have a difficult, very difficult character, difficult for me as well, it could be easily defined as a total catastrophe. I am extremely contradictory, very arrogant, sometimes highly conceited and very often I pretend that nothing and no one can touch or scratch me.
My silences, my contradictions, my absurd behaviors are mixed with moments of extreme fragility that are always very well masked with attitudes of extreme coldness and detachment, I can not do much about it, I accept it as part of me.
My dark side always acts impulsively, with extreme force on my weaknesses and my moments of fragility, transforming them in attitudes that in general might hurt people that surround me.
There is something, an hidden, or better defined as unexpressed truth that today is going out of the impregnable beautiful golden castle and my bully dark side is not able to stop it.

Well how to begin, here we go …

I feel a bit like a tiny, insignificant speck of sand on the beach of this life that looks at the horizon with a bit of fear of the wind, a wind that with rapid breath can sweep away the tiny speck of sand, who knows where, who knows when. This feeling is in general not part of my personality and triggers strong reactions of my dark side that strongly opposes it, so the tiny speck of sand cannot find a sort of unstable peace and let the warm sand hugs him.
I feel like lost, a little insecure, this energy takes over every part of my mind, of my body, of my heart and I’m happily helpless without any chance or wish to contain or stop it, sometimes with a fear that Aeolus decides to breathe and blows me away, a tiny grain of sand in the hands of Aeolus fantasies.

You are a force, an energy, a power that takes possession of me completely.

I’m feeling this energy, I’m enjoying it, is sweet.

A thought is flying to you
Good night My Muse

 

 

My Dear Muse,

I read these sentences today and my thoughts were all just for you.

You are in my sky, I see your light.
Your glow reaches my soul, already aware of your existence.
My eyes, never tired of looking for you, are full of you.
Nights are lit by your presence that bring new dreams on which to fly.
My star, I see you, I feel you.

A thought is flying to you
Good night My Muse

 

 

My Dear Muse,

It is night in my village, slowly slowly the lights around are dying out and tonight I feel like a poet or an artist that can overlook the world and I have so many emotional thoughts in mind that I‘m almost scared to lose them or not to have enough time to capture them or to see them flying away.

The view begins to change with the onset of the night, it seems that the night with his cloak wraps in silence everything.

I feel like in equilibrium between several different worlds or several lives or just several parts of one life made with many contrasting aspects like a mosaic with many brilliant colors that can shine in a different way dependent on how the light of the sun glints.

Sometime it is not easy to be brave enough to express deep thoughts and feelings, but then I wonder, why no? It is nice to express them, right?

Since life is unpredictable and tomorrow is an hypothesis and now I‘m feeling these sweet sentiments, I write these lines for you:

you do not know how important is just that you exist;
you do not know how much you can fill my heart with many different emotions;
you do not know how much I‘m pleased to be so absorbed by thoughts about you;

I feel your presence and this feeling is a pleasure, so intense for me.

I bought some very special silk, silk of San Leucio and I will try some experiments mixing it with some colors and canvass, I‘ m very curious and excited to start it.

A thought is flying to you
Good night My Muse

 

 

My Dear Muse,

I know a very nice poem in dialect (of the famous Toto‘), it is so sweet and I have decided to translate it for you even if I’m not that sure that the translation works.

Si fosse n‘ auciello
Si fosse n‘auciello, ogne matina
vurria cantà ncoppa a fenesta toja:
“Bongiorno, ammore mio, bongiorno, ammore!“.
E po‘ vurria zumpà ncoppa e capille
e chiano chiano, comme a na carezza,
cu stu beccuccio accussi piccerillo,
mme te mangiasse e vase a pezzechillo
si fosse nu canario o nu cardillo.

If I were a small bird
If I were a small bird, every morning
I would love to sing, over your window:
“ Good morning, my love, good morning ammore!”.
And then I would jump on your hair
and slowly slowly, like a caress,
with my beak so little small,
I could eat you with kisses a little bit at a time
if I were a canary or a goldfinch.

This evening I can feel you, your presence and your energy invades me giving me joy, happiness and determination.

Thanks for existing

A thought is flying to you
Good night My Muse

 

 

My Dear Muse,

Today is a so dark day, I’m surrounded by a so intense grey sky, it seems a bit evil, melancholically sad. This dry sky emanates a very peculiar energy, harsh, kind of very dry, extraordinarily cold, almost freezing as a gust of an invisible wind, I wish to escape, just right now.

Last night I did not sleep well, I think my inner demon was agitated, very turbulent, a bit wild and I had a vision that now is a clear story, the theme, the thread and all the pieces are getting together and all will be in my next exhibition.

I must admit that in this period I’m mixing up textiles, colors, words, paintings, tissues … let see.

I’m curios about the result of this mix, I’m sure that these are several parts of a very interesting puzzle, so I’m getting more and more curious about the final result.

I’m just thinking that we are very dangerous together because we are like waves (the wave’s concept is very interesting), we propagate in time and space, we can carry energy or momentum without creating an associated shift in the matter.

Waves, waves that can be flat, spherical, cylindrical, one-dimensional or three-dimensional, longitudinal or transverse. It is difficult to follow them without contrast but just being able to be in tune, aligned.

I get, carry and feel your energy.

Ah my Muse, waves are very dangerous.

I’m enjoying this journey, this evolution, word after word, a bit like a painting when brush stroke after brush stroke gradually with thin layers a masterpiece is created.

A thought is flying to you
Good night My Muse

 

 

My Dear Muse,

I had a very productive weekend, I managed to complete and to place my new 4 paintings and now my apartment is full and I have decided that as next step I will start to eliminate some useless furniture. This is going to be a dangerous exercise.

I have started as well my new painting, actually it is one of my hundreds of drawings.

I have started with some colors a bit dark but light will come in it and will enlighten it.

I‘ m working at the concept of my next painting, the first painting was a “previous life“ and the next painting is going to be a “total abstraction” of the present.

The flow, half of the painting, following the diagonal of the rectangular is going to be three tridimensional folds of different colors giving the effect of the intensity and development of the waves and all this kind of unexpressed sensations, some said not said words, the chemistry, the escape and the charisma.

The other half of the painting will be flat and will contain an intersection of the abstraction of some secret elements, mysteriously secret.

The drawing that express this abstraction will be very interesting.

I surprised myself, nobody will never never understand it.

So I’m getting more and more curious to start.

A thought is flying to you
Good night My Muse